I remember a certain sun-soaked night,
Where I was happy.
I knew of a world of joy,
A world of harmony.
That was but a fantasy I suppose,
A sight from above the walls I’d built around me.
I craved for those joys sometimes,
An urge to climb these walls, just to feel the breeze.
To feel the air of companionship,
The bounties of making acquaintances.
But all I found was gloom,
All I could smell was but a stench of vindication and doom.
I am scared of what lies beyond these walls,
The people, their cold eyes, their gazes.
I built these walls for a reason,
The reason, the very people beyond the climb.
I’d like to meet them sometime,
When I am well enough for disappointments again.
Until then I fear the light that I thus see,
For having been pushed too far, I made a home;
Here amidst the sullen darkness.
For they seldom knew or cared to know,
And the ones that did, momentarily walked away.
Too hard to explain, too hard to understand,
Is this pain I am in, I lie here on this cold floor;
I bled my heart and soul in their pages,
I poured myself into their memoirs, filled those empty lines.
When my walls tore down, and I lay bare;
They simply turned those pages around,
My eyes burn, here in this halo of agony,
I wish to be alone now, away from company.
Forgive me for my sadness, apologies for being so morose,
I gave up on society long ago, now I am;
Void. Vacant. Alone.